I see a light at the end of the tunnel, and a raise in my future

Finally some good news! It seems like everyday for the past year the topics of the day were: 1) the weather, 2)the war 3)the economy. Well, its still hot as hell outside, and our troops are still being deployed, but more people are being employed. That's right, we're hiring! Good news for the economy, which is great as I'm really tired of hearing all the negative news feedback. A classmate of mine reports that over the past 4 months, the US has had over 573,000 jobs filled. As a bartender, I have a sense of job security; people, no matter how broke they are, will go out and drink. First general thought is "Come in friends, drown your unemployment sorrows!" However, unemployed people don't tip very well, meaning I don't get paid well, which means I don't spend well. (This isn't true, I always spend well. But for the argument's sake...) Thus, the economy continues to plummet. But with more US citizens celebrating their newly found jobs, as one of my regulars actually did just the other night, my pay goes up and the economy continues to thrive as I head straight for the mall. Now the unemployment rate is still at a heavy 9.9% due to the unemployed who are not actively seeking jobs, but we won't think about the lazy ones that won't get off the couch to try to find work. So thank you Derek, for that bit of wonderful news! I had no idea I was getting a raise this weekend!